What to do with brats

I have a confession to make: I was a brat.

There are a lot of us around, so odds are you probably work with one or are one (c’mon, I confessed; you can too).

The damage a brat can do

I’m talking about young (mostly), headstrong employees who know everything. In the presence of strong leadership and a good team environment brats usually just become the irritating, know-it-all employees that everyone else avoids at lunch.

But in a negative work environment—or one marked by a lot of conflict and change—brats become, well, brats. Headstrong, mad at the world, in disagreement with everything and in support of nothing that managers and leaders want to get done. In fact, they can be even a little subversive and take delight in pointing out the many reasons that initiative X is stupid and will only make things worse.

That’s the one I was for most of my late twenties. Not my best years.

Hi, my name is John, and I have an attitude problem

Anyway, I knew I was a brat at the time. I was even more irritated by the fact that my manager didn’t stop me than I was by whatever he was doing that I was working against.

He could have severely disciplined me or transferred me out. I’m basically a pleaser, so once disciplined it’s unlikely that things would have progressed to firing.

But he didn’t. What he did was keep trying to work with me. He kept the lines of communications open, and every time I made an ass of myself he gave me another shot to do better.

How it turned out

In the short term, this approach didn’t work. I eventually got out of control enough that the only thing I could do was quit, which I did. Then my life took a turn, and I ended up back in the same organization a few years later in a more senior position working as a contractor for the same manager I was such a brat to.

And I was better. I was older and being away had cooled me off. He was still trying to dig out whatever redeeming quality he had seen in me, and this time I responded. A year later he was promoted and recommended me for his job, which I got.

What I do now

Since that promotion five years ago I’ve had a couple brats to deal with myself. I usually get a lot of advice on how I should handle these folks, mostly pleas to fire them. And I would have 10 years ago.

But if I see some glimmer of a redeeming quality under all the bad attitude then I hang on, just like my old boss did. I keep the lines of communication open, and every time the brat makes an ass of himself I give him another shot to do better.

I’ve turned some and lost some. I’ve shuffled some out the door after their damage started to exceed their potential in my organization. But I think it’s worth it to hang on, at least for a while. And I’m grateful someone hung on for me.